top of page

Do What Works for You, for as Long as It Works for You


As a mum, you've likely heard countless opinions on what you should or shouldn't do. From well-meaning friends and family to societal expectations and online advice, it can feel overwhelming trying to navigate the sea of shoulds and shouldn'ts. But here's the thing: You are the expert on your own life and your own children. So, do what works for you, for as long as it works for you.

The pressure on mums to conform to a certain standard of parenting can be intense. Whether it's the decision to breastfeed or bottle-feed, co-sleep or use a crib, return to work or stay at home – everyone seems to have an opinion. And while advice can be helpful, it often comes with an implicit judgment that can make you doubt your own choices.

Adding to the confusion, people often quote pseudo-science or confuse correlation with causation to back up their strong opinions and push their agendas onto others. It’s important to critically evaluate the information you receive and make decisions based on what truly works for your family, rather than feeling pressured by potentially misleading or biased advice.

Your mental health is more important than any external expectation. Motherhood is challenging enough without the added stress of trying to meet everyone else's standards. Trust yourself and your instincts. If something isn't working for you, it's okay to make a change. Your happiness and well-being are vital, not just for you but for your entire family.

Let's take the good old example of Breastfeeding vs. bottle-feeding, as that's soemthing people tend to have strong opinions about. Not every mum finds breastfeeding to be a feasible or enjoyable option, and that's ok. If you're struggling with breastfeeding and it's impacting your mental health, it's important to recognize when to pull the plug. A fed baby is a happy baby, whether that nourishment comes from breast milk or formula. Your well-being is crucial, and if bottle-feeding is what works for you and your family, then it's the right choice. Similarly, sleeping arrangements and decisions about work should be based on what helps your family the most, not on external pressures.

It's not just external pressure though; internal pressure can be just as overwhelming. We often set incredibly high expectations and standards for ourselves, pushing ourselves to the brink of exhaustion trying to hit those marks. We forget that happy mums = happy babies. Your baby needs you to be happy. Most other things are secondary.


At the end of the day, you have to live with your choices. Embrace what works for you and let go of the rest. Your journey is unique, and your mental health is paramount. So, the next time someone tries to tell you what you should or shouldn't do, remember: Do what works for you, for as long as it works for you.

Navigating motherhood is challenging, but remember that you are the best judge of what's right for you and your family. Trust in your ability to make the right decisions and prioritize your mental health above all else. You're doing an incredible job, mama.

1 Comment

Rated 0 out of 5 stars.
No ratings yet

Add a rating
Guest
Jun 04
Rated 5 out of 5 stars.

I needed to hear that today!

Like
bottom of page